A Rose in my Heart

There’s a rose in my heart

It grows everyday

The thorns twist through me every time you two call me names

Every time you two call me a slur

I can’t help but pelt you back with my own hurtful words

Feeding the rose

The rose grows and grows

Will it ever die?

I want it to die.

I never loved you

I wanted to be friends

But you two dragged me along

It makes me cry

You call me a baby for hating it

You call me a baby for following along

You call me a baby for trying to be happy

Yet the spines still twist into my heart

I can’t help but tag along because the spines will rip me to shreds if we run from one another or

rather

If I run.

You see an accursed parasite clinging on sucking you of attention

You call me an “Attention Whore”

I see a bag of fertilizer stable but also able to explode; a shiny pearl, delicate and soft but also

stained with the blood of cruelty; a small hand bag, so much package.

I call us, a sinister triplet

I try to balance us to create a melodious quartet with her

But it’s only a bandaid to this gaping wound

Vissi D’arte was always my favorite work

You always called it weird to enjoy historical music,

Preferring more contemporary works

But in the end, I realize I should’ve trusted myself and ran before this seed of doubt would ever

form

Before it would ever bud out

Before it would have bloomed

No. Before it would have ever conceptualized

Before it existed

Before I existed.

But I know that before I loved my existence enough to not regret this Greek tragedy

But I know that when he uttered “You’re that one friend no one likes, and agrees should kill

themselves”

I should’ve backed off

But now,

Here I am holding my fertilizer, as you pull out your shiny new knife, with a small pearl

embedded

We’re in a non zero sum game

Yet you still call me a baby for wanting this to end

To stop the you two from saying more

So I can stop pelting you with things that we shouldn’t say

So I can leave you behind

You’ll say this is another attempt to get your attention

But this is the clearest moment I’ve seen in my life

I love every moment of it

Even if leaving it will pull my heart out

I’ll gladly root this rose out when I have the strength to do it

A

A is from Piedmont, California and attends Piedmont High School.

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we made a home out of You